penglipurlara

My photo
Cyberjaya, Malaysia
I'm happily turning 25. Don't too close, I'm scarier than your mother.

someday

DO FAIRY TALES COME TRUE DADDY? NO HONEY, DREAMS COME TRUE.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

berombak ombak kerinduan

hello all.

orait rasanya semua pon dah tahu topic apa yg salu org perkatakan sekarang ni. tak lain tak bukan filem berombak ombak kerinduan. haha. its Ombak Rindu. kata orang, Malay movie of the year. dan dgr cerita juga kutipan dah cecah 9juta skrg kan? wuuhuuuu!! aku rasa dlm 1st week ditayangkan, mmg terus hot gila topik ombak rindu. automatic pompuan2 kat luar sana meroyan dkt twitter. and aku boleh bet Aaron Aziz punya mentions pun mendadak naik dari biasa. haha. okay bila dah tengok response gila babi dari member2 yg dah tgk, aku pon terasa nak tengok. aku pergi dgn sayang aku, Jia. couple seat lagi okay. zassss!! dah la lambat masuk, taknak semua pulak pandang kitorg siap pegang tangan carik seat. hikhik.

okay entah kenapa cerita ni tak berapa nak tangkap hati aku. idk why. mmg ade scene yang sedih la but nak keluarkan air mata tu mmg jauh lagi. minah yg duduk sebelah jia tu nangis mcm kena pukul kot. adooii aku pulak rasa nak pukul. i mean klu menitis tu logik diterima lah, ni sampai basah2 baju bf die tu, aku rasa mcm buat buat je. hahaha, jahatnya. aku punya sedih tu takat berkerut muka je. then aku terpikir. ke aku yg batuuu sangat? hahaha. habis je cerita tu aku dgn jia pun berborak2 psl cerita ni. maybe psychology thinking aku cakap cerita ni ain't real at all. i mean bkn cara pelakon dia sampaikan watak tu. tapi jalan cerita tu yg mmg kita tahu lah tak logik kan. namanya pun adaptasi dr novel. seriusly aku tak suka sesuatu benda yg tak real dan melampau. aku tak rasa yg org mcm mak dia tu jahat sampai mcm tu ada dkt malaysia ni. and ade ke pompuan garang dan bengis mcm singa gampang mcm Mila tu? so cemana aku nak sedih? aku tahu bende tu takda. but allahualaammm..mana tahu ada kan.

susah klu ade org mind set mcm aku ni. haha. benda ni reflect terus dari cara pemikiran terus effect dkt emosi. kalau mmg cerita fiksyen yg merepek2 spaceship bagai tu lain lah. so dlm cerita ni ade certain2 part je yg buat aku sedih. aaron punya air mata paling mahal. itu yang paling real. one more thing, klu kite tgk Osman Ali punya filem semua shot lain dr yg lain. mcm anak halal, Lagenda Bdk Setan and latest Ombak Rindu ni. tp aku rasa color and shot filem Lagenda Budak Setan paling nice kot. but then it was a good film. good job Ombak Rindu. aku terbaca dari mana tah org ade cakap endingnya mcm tergantung. mmg klu ikut novel banyak lagi plot dia pon. tp katanya director nnt ade sambungan. katanya byk lagi dugaan yg Izzah tu hadap nnt. so kita sama sama lah tunggu okay.  oh lupa! tapi lagu lagu dlm filem ni sumpah best. yang ni tangkap jiwa. jangan lupa download! haha.

have a nice Thursday ahead.




Thursday, December 1, 2011

stay or leave. you choose.

hello people

its raining now. and i was laying on my bed just now. thinking of something that always popping in my head recently. anyways, am just thinking of it and i'm not really sure if peoples out there were really think about this just like the way i do. well its about guys personality btw. honestly i have to admit that i can't force anybody to be my type. i mean, just let 'em be of who and what they are. there's nothing to do with that. hell NO. yes i did said that i like a guy with sepet eyes, taller than me and bla bla bla. but come on, do you think that i'm that serious to find those characteristics to find my true love? crap! if you think so, then i can scream loudly this to your face " YOU DON'T KNOW ME AT ALL" :)

aku tak pernah bagitahu mana mana lelaki, lelaki yg macamana yang aku betul betul nak. because i just want them to be themself. whats the point at the 1st place if you lie to yourself and act like you are my dream guy. bazirrrr kan? well, im not that extremely choosy. kita sedar diri lah kan. no one knows what kind of guy that i can fall to. i bet this. selalunya i do fall in love naturally. yang aku tak pernah plan dan yang aku tak pernah jangka. u know like "wei dia ni handsome, baekk. nak try lah" NO NO NO. well tipu lah kan klu perempuan tak pernah ckp mcm ni. but then, it will end up just like that. ya know girlssss talk? gossiping hot guys. biasalah kan. hahaha. nak nak kawan kawan aku. LOL.

one thing that i realize, bercinta secara tak dirancang ni yang paling jujur. this is how it came naturally. been there done that. falling in love with your own best friend is the sincere love ever. nothing to hide, nothing to fake. but i guess this real  love only happened once in life. idk. just saying. hopefully im wrong.

so.......guys out there. don't act like you know me so well. ain't anyone does. If you like me, impress me. if i'm saying that you did shitass, then defend yourself and proof to me that im wrong. be yourself. i wont tell what is wrong, what is right. if you are trully a man, you should know differentiate this and you know what to do. its time to leave your 'boys' world, be a man. that's how i watched you.

Beat him.




Sunday, November 27, 2011

masih belum lagi

belum lagi

bila ditanya pada mulut, mulut kata tipu
bila ditanya pada hati, hati kata tak mahu
bila ditanya pada mata, mata kata pergi
bila ditanya pada jiwa, jiwa kata mati

belum lagi

bila disuruh cari, datangnya tak henti
bila disuruh cuba, tak ada yang reti mengerti
bila disuruh beri, tak pernah puas hati
bila disuruh lupa, serupa mcm bunuh diri sendiri

belum lagi

belum lagi

masih belum lagi










sedangkan

A : kenapa kau nampak mcm tak sedih bila berpisah dengan dia?
B : buat apa aku perlu rasa sedih?
A : aku tak faham
B : buat apa aku rasa sedih sedangkan orang yang sepatutnya lebih sedih adalah dia.
A : kenapa pulak?
B : sebab aku hilang orang yang tak sayangkan aku, tapi dia hilang orang yang paling sayangkan dia. :)



















* Thanks to : Wan Nashrul *

Thursday, November 24, 2011

That one guy


that one guy who annoys me everyday with his jokes
.....and  pissed me off like seriously fucking annoying.
that one guy who fight with me every second
.....and at the end he'll gave me win no matter what.
that one guy who always makes me mad
.....and he did that again after few hours he said sorry
that one guy who stalked me on Twitter
.....and he just simply admit this to me
that one guy who tried so hard to make me jealous
.....and end up he's the one who jealous much
that one guy who make trouble on our 1st met
.....and we fight in the car, he said sorry & yes we still fight.


But wait................


This guy never give up to win my heart
This guy never afraid to tell me i love you
This guy never bored to said I'm beautiful
This guy always wanted to prove that he is the best to this daddy's little girl

This guy. this guy. this guy.
When will you going to give up on me.









Tuesday, November 15, 2011

tiada siapa

pernah rasa bila tiba tiba rasa benci pada diri sendiri timbul?
pernah duduk bersandar dekat pintu bilik dlm keadaan gelap selama 3jam tanpa buat apa apa?
pernah mandi sampai tak tahu mana air mata mana air shower yg mengalir dekat pipi?
pernah baring atas lantai tak beralas apa apa tengah2 hall sambil pandang silling rumah?
pernah menangis tepi pintu bila intai mak berdoa lepas solat?
pernah berhenti tepi highway menangis sebab rasa tak ada jalan keluar lagi?

pernah?

jangan anggap orang yang senyum ceria hari hari ini tiada resah dalam hatinya.
jangan anggap orang yg ketawa pd jenaka ini tiada duga dalam jiwanya.
jangan anggap orang yg bernyanyi riang ini tiada duri dalam otaknya

luarannya aku ada semua.
semua. ada yang kata aku beruntung.
aku boleh senyum aja sebab org tak pernah nampak diri aku sebetulnya.


senyum
senyum
senyum



Friday, October 28, 2011

I've choose mine

what would you do when suddenly you think that you're totally a loner?
who don't have any close friends, bff and a boyfriend to support you and cheer you up.
to fill your heart with happiness, to laugh like an idiot together.
when suddenly you felt like the world is empty and black
no sounds of a bird, no smells of trees, rainless, and the only thing in your head is....am i that loser?

i really really really and really don't have the answer.
and i don't know how to create one.


because i have everything in my life
i have mak and ayah who never stop teach me just like 6yo little girl
i got friends which used to be my back bones.
laugh like a silly girl every second with em'
shares everything, they automatically appear when im down.
lend me their shoulders to cry on.
but yeah, i don't have any boyfriend.
apatah lagi scandals. bullshits.
am not even searching. i can live without em' seriously.
and single doesn't mean that you're a loser and loner.
some people have their own reason why they choose to be single.
so do i.


always and everyday.


i don't want to lose what i have now.
i feel grateful i got the chance to felt this kinda joyful feeling
so the loners out there, don't worry. the world never empty and black.
never. i was just saying.
you still can hear the sounds of birds because that's what ears functioning for,
you still can smell  the fresh of the trees because God gives you the sense.
you still can feel the coldness of the rain because God want us to pray for grace.

whatever happened in your life now, bare in mind,
there must be reason.
be clever enough to decide which path you choose for your journey.
don't turn back even you are regretting for something.
long way to go, the light will always with you.


i've choose mine.
and i won't turn back.
my life ain't sucks. am not a loner. at all.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Cameron Highland

hello peeps!
okay hari ni mood ada sikit kacau, but its okay, put aside those bullshits now, cause there's a wonderful and precious moment that i ever had to share here. yeeehhaa!!! okay last week, ada yang dah tahu and ade yang still tak tahu yang aku and the whole class melunaskan project Intercultural dekat Cameron Highland. 
and......................................................................



WOWWW!!! seriously i feel something that i couldn't describe by myself. ohsem, marvelous,fabulous, fantastic, joyful, happiness!!! maigad, it was totally the best trip i ever had. i love the environment,  the nature, the weather, people around us especially our foster families, they are very kind and sentiasa berikan kitorg yang terbaik. mak ayah angkat dkt sana tersangatlah baik, makan cukup dan sedap. bercerita itu ini, riuh sana sini and yesss i miss Cameron so much. i bet the whole class feels the same. we're just like the real family even dalam masa yg singkat, 3hari. bestnya kalau boleh duduk sana seminggu, lupakan sesak dan serabut bandar sekejap, itu baru betul puas. but what can we do kan? pergi sana bukannya pergi bercuti jalan lenggang. haha. oh actually kat sana kitorg ada byk activity sort of CSR macam mengaja kanak kanak tadika Kg Taman Sedia. at the first place, kitorg tak expect yg kanak2 sume tu sangat lahh suka dgn kedatangan kitorg. as fara said to me kan, baru je masuk gate tadika tu dorg dh dtg and cakap "akak, masuk lah masuklah cepat" and mcm nk tarik kitorg dh. memang jelas sgt nmpk kanak2 tu enjoy dan nakal nakal ye. hehe. teringat pula si Omar dgn Farris, maigodd pening kepala aku. haha. 

on the 2nd day, kitorg pergi bersihkan kawasan kubur dgn surau dekat situ. boys akan pergi bersihkan kubur and girls bersihkan surau. activity ni aku tak in charge, so aku bangun lambat hari tu. hewhewhew. sedappp woo tido tejuk tejuk. :p lepas tu ade Cameron Tour. pergi minum teh, bee farm, rose farm, insect ape tah and byk lagi tempat. tak ingat pulak nama. then malam tu ada bbq and persembahan from each group. dah mcm ape dh malam tu. but it was fun seriously. then the 3rd day kitorg hiking Gunung Berembun, start hiking pukul 6pagi. feeuhh. aku rasa moment ni paling best sekali. yang tak rapat tetibe jadi rapat. bila fikir2 balik, rasa kelakar bila masa first2 hiking aku dgn geng jalan dlm kumpulan, kira hiking sekali la. bila dah lama sikit dah kt tgh2, sorang2 hilang. haha. tengok2 masing2 carik lelaki mintak tlg. sorg2 hilang tu tak sedar. dah susah pandai pulak carik laki mintak tlg kan. haha. nasib lah aku dgn apek, dah mmg kwn. yang lain2 tu sume nye tak brape rapat, tetibe mntk tlg. terus jadi rapat. haha. okay nak buat pengakuan jujur  jap sekarang ni, kalau tak psl apek, mmg aku tak lepas nak naik gunung tu. SERIOUS. mmg ramai yg give up and sumpah aku rasa nk menangis ade satu part tu. apek lah yg byk tolong and finally aku antara yg awal jugaklah sampai puncak. kira tengah2. hahahaha. oh lupe, benda paling gampang sekali bila sorg jatuh, mmg teruk gila kena bahan, kena gelak kaw2 punye. gampang btol dak2 niii. 

so i can say that i was totally enjoy this trip. i've learned so many things. lupa masalah sekejap. and thanks to the legend Sir Razlan yang hiking pakai sandals je. haha. sempoi suda. thank you so much sir and all friends and we are anak anak angkat Kg Tmn Sedia!! weeehuuuu! i miss Cameron, mak dengan ayah. love.









Wednesday, September 28, 2011

aku tidak

aku lega tetapi sedih
kali ini siapa pula yang tolong jelaskan?

rupanya bukan tidak kena dimata aku sahaja.
tetapi di mata semua.
aku sudah mendengar, aku sudah melihat.
selebihnya aku tidak percaya.

betul, manusia boleh berubah.
tetapi masih, aku tidak percaya.

aku masih lagi mendengar, tidak lagi melihat.
tidak berkesempatan mungkin?

tapi syukur, aku sudah boleh bernafas lancar.
otak tidak selerak dulu.
kerana bukan aku sahaja yg bertanda soal di kepala.
sekurang kurangnya orang lain membela hak mereka.

aku TIDAK.
kerana aku mengalah.

aku TIDAK
kerana aku tidak peduli lagi

aku TIDAK
mengapa perlu peduli?

aku lega, tetapi masih sedih.
tolong jadikan "aku tidak percaya" itu berbaloi.


Monday, September 26, 2011

hujan tolong jelaskan

bunyi yang paling damai adalah bunyi rintik hujan yang Allah berikan.
sejuk. wangi. tik tik tik tik...................................

tepi tingkap, berdiri di situ kaku
objek berpetak petak yang sama aku lihat setiap hari.
yang terangnya berpenghuni. yang gelapnya tidak.

anak mata ke bawah pula,
satu kereta kuning. cantik. idaman hati dah lama.
pemiliknya berlari lari ke gerai kecil makcik power
tak ada payung. kesian.

.................................dan bosan. tak ada apa berlegar di otak sekarang.
hati pula kosong. tetapi jiwa tenang.
siapa boleh jelaskan?

tingkap tadi. aku tutup kembali.
refleksi muka manis di kaca. senyum....
tetapi tidak panjang

7 saat menjadi patung. mati disitu

lihat dalam dalam. lihat lama lama.
makin lama dikaburi dgn titisan hujan tadi.
sampai tiada lagi muka.
cair. satu satu.

oh aku dah nampak.
dia tolong jelaskan rupanya.
Hujan

Thursday, September 22, 2011

its been so long


oh hello semua!

maigadd it's been so long i didn't update my black diary. been busy with classes and tons of work. getting sick and crazy with all this assignment and task. i mean like, there's no difference between me and robots now. lol. i wish i can just skip this 'chapter' of my life. dangg!! impossible. how am i gonna capture my dream profession aite? huhu. well there's nothing much to update. my routine is quite boringg. go to class morning till evening and sometimes till night. yess, no entertainment, no karok, no oyehyeh, no shopping. haha. put aside those things.
this is the most tough semester i've been through. well i can sense my pointer will drop again. :( aarggghhhh. makin lama makin jatuh pon tak bolehh nii. thank god i dont get attach to any guy. kalau tak lagi kelaut aku. haha. biaq pi lah hangpa suma nak bercintaa. pi pi pi. aku takmauu. haha.

oh before terlupa,

SELAMAT HARI JADI AYAH
Semoga panjang umur dan dimurahkan rezeki.
Atie sayang ayah :)

so thats all for today. will be update more late-err. :p 
have a nice day uoollss.
love, yayanggg

*tetiba berbeza pulak ending post aku*

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Salam Aidilfitri buat semua

hello assalamualaikum semua,

hows your raya so far? sesiapa yang dapat merasa raya kat kampung tu konfem happening kan. main bunga api, bertenggek kat tangga cot cet cot cet, malam2 jalan rumah sedara mara pakai torch light, pasang pelita dengan sedara, baling mercun dekat ayam, beyak dekat jamban kayu sbb makan byk sgt time raya. feeeuhhhh how i missed this a lot!! surprisingly, tahun ni dah raya ke 5 aku dengan family raya kl. so u guys can imagine how i really missed those old raya memories kan. sob sob. if dulu kalau raya dekat Terengganu banyak gila dpt duit raya, sampai seribu pon ade siott. sekarang ni dh besau, ayah mak dgn siblings jela yg bagi. huhu. actually dkt kampung dah takde sapa, so every year pon we all raya kl. 

sadly, this year turn my siblings balik rumah mertua, lagi sorang abang pulak ada dekat India, kerja. kesiann dia. we all miss you brotha! pagi raya tu sempat skype dgn die, itupun die tgh rushing nk pergi ofis, skype sambil pakai kasut, bolehhhhh? haha. so this year punya raya, i kinda feel soooooooooo boringgggg!! 1st day raya gua tido je kot? haha. kalau dlu 1st raya mesti tgk movie, tapi skrg dok dohhh. tadok dohh. haha. oh btw, thanks to Palau yg bawak aku pergi jalan TAR 2 days before raya. yipppiiii! tapi tapi tapi apa yang dicari takde. :( baju raya dah ada sebenanye, but nak carik baju utk convo. haaa alang2 dah cerita pasal convo ni, sesiapa yang sayang diri ini, tolonglah hadirkan diri dengan membawa bunga ros putih kegemaran saya pd 17 october 2011 di kampus Bestari Jaya, Unisel. hewhewhew. siap request kau!! haha.

okay dikesempatan ini, saya dan keluarga ingin mengucapkan Salam Aidilfitri kepada semua umat Islam terutama kpd saudara mara, tawan tawan saya, lecturers yang byk berjasa, sesiapa yang mengenali dan especially to all black diary's readerssss! Maaf Zahir dan Batin, have a bless Raya this year! 



Friday, August 26, 2011

sepatutnya sebaliknya

2 bulan lepas.
sepatutnya aku sudah mula berangan dan tersenyum.
sepatutnya aku sudah mula pening dan kelam kabut.
sepatutnya aku sudah mula merancang sesuatu.
sepatutnya aku sudah mula mencongak congak duit

sebulan lepas
sepatutnya aku sudah mula mencari sesuatu istimewa senyap senyap
sepatutnya aku sudah menempah sesuatu yang akan sentiasa diingat
sepatutnya aku sudah bersedia dgn ucapan dan sebaris ayat sebagai pelengkap.

hari ini
sepatutnya aku memberi sesuatu istimewa tetapi tidak
sepatutnya aku berikan kata itu tetapi tidak
sepatutnya aku sudah ucapkan pada kamu tetapi tidak.




tetapi masih,
selamat hari jadi.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

patah seribu

I'm sooo in love with every single of her cover. but currently addicted to this one. 
listen deeply. 



PATAH SERIBU.

Walau kau tiada di sini
Ku tetap ingat semua pesanmu
Ku hidup seolah-olah kau masih ada
Bisikan kata kepadaku

Bilakah kau akan utuskan surat buatku
Aku terus menunggu tibanya kata cintamu

oh.. patah seribu hatiku
Bila mengenangkan segala yang kita bina bersama
Haruskah ku lupa kerna engkau telah pergi

Biar pergimu tanpa relamu
Namun hatiku tetap rasa
Kejamnya kau meninggalkanku dengan nota-nota
Cinta buat kita berdua bila kan ku bisa menerima ketiadaanmu
Kan ku bakar semua hapuskan semua kenangan

Patah seribu hatiku
Bila mengenangkan segala yang kita bina bersama
Haruskah ku lupa kerna engkau telah pergi

Sayangku mohon padamu
Segera tinggalkanku
Pergilah kau ke tempat yang kau tuju
Pasti ada hikmah buatmu dan juga buat diriku

Pergilah

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

hardest week : weak

hello tawan tawan.
sepanjang bulan Ramadhan nii, aku tak berkesempatan lagi nak ucapkan selamat berpuasa kepada semua umat Islam dan stalker2 blog ni. eheeeeee.  mudah mudahan bulan puasa ini lebih diberkati. utk pengetahuan semua, aku dah pun melalui minggu yg sangaaaattttt menduga kesabaran aku, dlm erti kata lain, dugaaaaaaaannnnn. huhu. last week was the hardest week of Ramadhan. mula mula hilang duit, aku perasan hilang duit tu masa nak bayar murtabak kat bazar. then balik tu kunci bilik pulak terkunci dlm bilik. haaiihhhh. terpaksa pecahkan tombol. and thanks to Jaja and Jia yg pecahkan. huhuhuhu. esoknya pulak lepas balik dari majlis berbuka puasa dengan anak yatim PEYAKIN, kunci kereta pulak hilang. wuuuuuhuuuuuu. direct siottt!! paling takbest, laptop dgn kerja2 semua dlm kereta tu, kerja nk kene submit by monday. cemanooo tuuu. itu takpe lagi, kunci rumah aku sekali pun ade dlm kerete tu.  oh btw, thanks to my beloved lecturer, Madam Azian so called Whitney sebab bagi izin submit assg when I'm ready. thank you Kak Yan.  lepas 4 hari baru lah jumpa kunci kereta tu. tercicir dlm van unisel. nasib baik kan. alhamdulilllahhhh jumpa balik. dah la kunci spare mmg takde. aku ada jugak survey harga berapa nak buat kunci lain, dia charge 4rat utk kunci shja tak termasuk alarm. zzzzzzzzzzz. berderai air mata kat kodai tu. hahahahaha. apa2 pun, itu suma dugaan okay. :) 

okay minggu tu mmg aku serabut gila, sampai lupa birthday abang sendiri. aku ingat pon sebab ayah call kata semua berbuka puasa dkt rumah ayah. aku? tercampak kat Shah Alam sebab tak boleh balik kunci hilang. 

*write message* typing...........

" Happy Birthday Aju. Atie sayanggggg Aju :) "

*message receive* open...........

"tq. Aju sayangg Atie jugak walaupun hilangkan kunci kereta. hehehehe"

uuuuuuwwwwaaaaa!!! itu shenttaaappppp otey! hahahahahaha. aku tak tahu kenapa aku send msg kat abg aku padahal boleh je bbm. haaaa nampak tak serabut and blurr aku tuuuuu? hahahaha. i was crying non stop okay. kesian dkt ayah klu tak jumpe kene lagi 4rat. tu klu termasuk alarm tak tahu lah berapa. ohh sebelum terlupa, thanks to all my friends yg tolong, hafizzy, farris,  fasihaa beyonce, rina yg call, Jaja, Joe, Jia yang teman lepak smpi pagi. Jia yg bagi pinjam kereta for 2days. assignment group members especially arep yg yk back up kerja aku. hamaaaiigaddd, thanks buddy! I really appreciate it. yang comment dkt status fb aku, thankss semua. and lastly for mr Hasni yg ambil balik kunci kete tu. :) thank you all...!!!! ohh tak lupe kepada cilake2 yg tweet aku dengan ayat mak bapak tak ajar, ade yg aku tepek je terus (mls nak sebut nama) kau tahu lah kau sapa, member tak member. ade jugak yg aku diam je, sbb aku tak sampai hati. tp mmg aku sentapp dgn kau. kau pandai2 lah perasan klu aku dh tak sembang kacang dgn kau tu sebab apa. simple kan? ade time boleh la weii nk buat lawak tingkatan 1 kau tu. pernah nampak aku sentap klu kau bahan2 aku ke ape ke? tak pernah enn? kali ni aku betol fucked up sbb timing tak kena. sekian.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

jangan mati. tapi tolong berhenti.

bukan sengaja nak kecewakan hati orang,
bukan niat nak sakitkan hati orang,

tapi dalam hal ni aku dah penat nk rasa sebersalah.
kalau nk suruh aku jgn rasa mcm tu, baik jangan
sbb aku manusia. human being.
kalau nk suruh aku ignore, rasenya aku belum fed up nk explain.
kalau aku dah fed up?

jangan tunggu.
sebab aku tahu hati aku. aku tahu rentak aku.
kau kata 5 tahun? aku yg pernah menunggu 3tahun pun rasa nk mati.
jadi aku taknak kau mati.
jangan mati, tapi tolong berhenti.
aku takmau hilang kwn. seperti mana aku dh hilang kwn baik aku yg paling aku syg.

bukan aku taknak. bukan aku tak cuba.
tapi hati ni mati terus. jatuhh tersembam terus.
hilang rasa terus. mati padam tertutup terus
entah bila nak hidup balik.
sisa ade lagi sekuman. entah bila nk pergi terus.
tak sabar. dan jangan dtg balik.
tak dendam tak benci, tp kecewanye mmg sampai mati.

jgn suruh aku fikir lagi. aku tak boleh.
jgn kata pleaseeeeee lagi. aku betul betul tak mampu nk beri.
kecewa skrg lebih baik dr 5tahun akan dtg yg kau tuntut.
kannnnnnnnn. ingat pesan aku, harap kau boleh buat. :)


bukan sengaja nak kecewakan hati orang,
bukan niat nak sakitkan hati orang,

Sunday, July 31, 2011

langit pun diam hari ini

mata mengecil membaca langit
2 minit. 3 minit. lama. 
pejam. rapat. sesal. "kau tersalah langkah lagi"

bodoh. itu yang terjerit dr hati kejam ini
ye memang bodoh. kau la sapa lagi.
kenapa hati kata lain, bdn buat lain.
dah kau memang bodoh, sebab tu kau buat mcm tu.

penat membaca angkasa.
macamlah dapat jawapannya.
mata melihat jari runcing. kiri kanan. garisan halus tangan.
eh mcm bentuk landasan keretapi pulak.
baru nk tersenyum. 

cerita cilake tadi dtg balik. aduhhhh
mengeluh. kalau lah boleh campak jauh jauh.
perang emosi, perang hati, perang otak..

kepala semak. mcm pukimakk 
sssshhhhh ssshhhhhh! apa carut carut nii
tarik nafas. tiup perlahan. lega tak?
TAK. 

pejam mata, bayangkan chenta yang fana
bukak mata, tengok daun hijau.
damai tak?
TAK.

cuba senyum. pahit. kelat. buat buat.
takpaaaa. pura pura. Singapura bolehh?
zzzzzzzzzzz merepekk! 

dah dah la, jangan buat benda bodoh tu lagi lain kali.
jadikan itu bodoh yang terakhir.
aku dah malas nak cakap kau bodoh lagi.
sebab KAU tu adalah AKU
bukan sesiapa. bukan orang lain. 

kali ini langit tak memberi jawapan. entah kenapa dia senyum sahaja. atau mungkin dia mahu katakan tindakan aku betol dan bukan bodoh? cakaplah cakaplah. :p

p/s: sorry post merepek sikit hari ni. apehal tah. 

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

hidden truth again

1. Your ex texted you and wanted you back. Would you take him/her back?
he choose not to be with me before, so its impossible.
2. Has anyone told you “forever and ever” then left?
yes when i was in form 3. LOL
3. Your relationship status?
single and not looking or searching
4. Where did you meet your crush(es)?
i don't have any. kahkahkah
5. Have you ever lost a close friend?
almost
6. Do you smoke weed regularly?
EXCUSE ME?! i don't take any.
7. Think back to the beginning of 2011. Are you still dating the same person?
nop.
8. Would you parents be mad if you were in a relationship?
haha takkan kott?
9. When was the last time you really laughed?
8 month ago? :)
10. Something is wrong. First guy you turn too?
my problem solver isn't there for me anymore, so......
11. First girl you’d turn to?
Jia Shamsuri
12. Is there anyone who doesn’t like you because of something you did?
yes. people make mistake, so do i
13. Angry at anyone?
now? 1.49 am : NO 
14. What’s stopping you from going for the person you like?
bad attitude, baran, yg buat aku rimas. 
15. When was the last time you cried really hard?
24 November 2010. hahaha am i too detail? hahahhhaahhaaha
16. Is there anyone you would do anything for?
of course, family.
17. Who was the last person you talked to for more than 10 minutes on the phone?
can't remember.
18. What is your favorite song?
jimmy eat world- here you me
19. Do you like Red Bull?
yes, but rarely drink it
20. How many people can you tell just about everything to?
hmmm two maybe
21. Have you ever wished on a shooting star?
no, i don't believe on that.
22. Does the last person you held hands with mean something to you?
yes, but it quite long time ago. 
23. Describe yourself in one word.
Independent
24. Do you have anything that belongs to your ex?
many. shirt, jersey. etc
25. Do you rebound?
............
26. Ever cheated on someone?
unfortunately yes.
27. What would you do if you found out the person you like was in a relationship?
if person that i like, I'm okay and doing nothing. if person that love, its different. 
28. Do you act differently around the person you like?
no. i don't know how to be someone else
29. Is it hard to make you laugh?
sometimes. only certain people know how to make me laugh like an evil. i miss them. you guys.
30. Who was the last person to make you mad?
its not a 'person' actually. I'm so fucking pissed off with Maxis. 
31. Do you think your last ex will eventually want to be with you again?
haha no. i know him well. 
32. Have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms?
yes.
33. Has anyone ever called you scrumptious before?
haha yes
34. Would you like to put a night on repeat and live it forever?
absolutely. pleaseeeeee
35. Do you have a best friend that knows you inside and out?
yes.
26. Is your best friend a slut?
hmmmm so far i don't think so.
27. Is hard drugs a turn off?
i don't know
28. Are you happy with life right now?
yess! i deserve it. :p
29. Are you still in love with your ex?
wuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu :p
30. Have you ever had your heart broken?
yes.
31. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
i wish i can turn back time.
32. Is there anybody you’re really disappointed in?
banyak.
33. Where is your best friend?
always by my side
34. Something you’re happy about?
my new cat, Yu.
35. How is your heart lately?
freedom!


p/s : 29, always and everyday

Saturday, July 23, 2011

cuma mungkin

kau takkan jumpa perempuan mcm aku lagi. mungkin ade yg kurang, mungkin ada yg lebih dari aku. tapi takkan ada mcm aku lagi.

aku takkan jumpa lelaki mcm kau lagi. mungkin ade yg kurang, mungkin ada yg lebih dari kau. tapi takkan ada mcm kau lagi.

aku berani janji ini. 

kalaulah muncul depan mata ini, itulah engkau jasad yang sama. yang aku kenali.
cuma mungkin cetus rasa itu tak ada lagi.

kalaulah muncul di depan mata kau suatu hari nanti, inilah juga jasad yg sama engkau kenali.
cuma mungkin hatinya tak sanggup lagi. 



Thursday, July 7, 2011

memang kesilapan manusia

manusia. baik macam mana sekali pun, bijak macam mana sekali pun, kesilapan tu mesti ada je kat celah celah. tak silap tak manusia lah nama dia. orang buat silap ada yg disengajakan, ada yang terpaksa, ada yang tak merancang tp terperangkap, ada yang nk selamatkan diri sendiri, ada juga untuk kepentingan diri sendri dan menggunakan org lain. paling kesian, kita langsung tak sedar pada mata mata yang melihat kebodohan yg disengajakan.


ingat lagi status ni 2days ago? after having deep talk with my special adviser, perihal manusia yang buat sesuatu mengikut kata nafsu, memberi ruang dan membenarkan diri diaibkan, memang KESILAPAN. kali ini sama ada sedar ataupun tidak sedar, mata yg melihat ada haknya. 

JADI

jangan salahkan mata yang terang ciptaan Allah ini.

lumrah manusia, dengar aja berita mulalah terus berprasangka. lebih lebih lagi berita durjana. hai mulut manusia, boleh mula mengata kalau dah nampak hitam putihnya. hitam putih itu tak pernah tipu dan palsu. depan mata. apa nak kata? yang tersebar, tak mustahil. nak terkejut apa? kita semua manusia.

JADI

jangan salahkan sok sek sok sek manusia yg tgh teruja. 

pangkalnya, cerita tak akan timbul kalau org betul betul jadi buta. paling penting, mata tak akan memandang pada sesuatu yg tidak dikira aib. tak ada apa yang nak dikejutkan. siapa pun engkau, mana pon engkau berdiri, dimana pon engkau tinggal, kita semua manusia. human being. kesilapan tu ada dimana mana. tapi yang boleh dielakkan, jadilah manusia yang matang dan sayangkan kehidupan sendiri. bukan memberi memberi dan memberi ruang lagi. 



Thursday, June 30, 2011

BUT

A REAL RELATIONSHIP

Has fights. Has trust. Has faith. Has tears. Has hurt. Has sweet smiles. Has genuine laughter. Has weird, stupid, unnecessary arguments. Has patience. Has communication. Has secrets. Has jealousy. And most importantly, love. This is all just a mess that turns out beautiful & an experience that can never be forgotten..

BUT

Today its been 1140 days since I know you. 30days as a friend. 900days as dramatic lover. 1 day letting you go and 209 love slowly fade away. Happy Anniversary 7months Moving on. :p

JADI

siapa kata kalau dua insan yg sedang bercinta AKAN bertemu bahagia? dan tak semestinya pasangan kekasih akan berkahwin. walaupun semua kemanisan itu ada, 'tetapi' ada dimana mana. Dia tak benarkan kita bersama. sebab Dia ada perancangan yg lebih baik untuk kita. 

                                                       

long way to go. ALWAYS AND EVERYDAY

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Mandatori : Case closed

okay relek relek tawan tawan, title entry kali ni mcm suspen je kann. haha. i just finished reading novel, Mandatori by Ramlee Awang Murshid. okay tahu dah mcm budak sekolah kan baca novel? so whattttt? I'm bored to death bila sem break. what else to do then? eh eh lupa pulak nak share, today i wake up at 11am. haha isn't it cool? kurang terasa keloseran. selalu pukul 2 bru bangun. ish ish ish! hari ni hari jujur sedunia kotttt? aku dah lama tak baca novel actually. ntah mana novel2 aku semua. ade yg pinjam terus lesap. bagi kucing makan agaknye. yang ayah buang banyak jugak. ini paling cool sekali, saboooo jelah. novel Mandatori ni aku dh penah baca tp dh ingat2 lupe jln cerita. so aku baca balik. mcm biaselah, pengarang buku ni antara favorite aku. dia ni takde tulis cite2 cinta, semua nye action and thriller. ADAM (Aku Darah Anak Malaysia) is the best novel i ever have!! kisah seorang penembak tepat yg setia pada negara dan mencari perempuan yg pernah didermakan separuh hatinya ketika perempuan itu bayi. sumpah interesting cite nii. go grab one guys.


okay skrg ni aku bknlah nk cite psl Adam, tp cite Mandatori yg aku baru je hbs baca ni. kisah ni mengenai seorang lelaki yg perjalanan hidupnye penuh dgn dendam. lelaki ini satu jasad tapi ada 4 personality. satu, seorang pendendam (Amran), dua, seorang yg tamak (Bogart) tiga, seorang yg baik hati (Norman), last, seorang pembunuh (Carlos). ketiga2 org ni adalah org yg sama yg sering berperang dgn jiwa dan fikiran. bermula dgn dendam Amran yg tk boleh terima hakikat bapanya telah dianiaya sehingga membawa ke tali gantung. lps tu Amran hanyut kat laut dan dijumpai oleh lanun, Amran yg memory lost dibagi nama Bogart yg berpersonaliti tamak. lepas tu muncul jiwa yg baik hati dlm diri dia dan last sekali datang pula jiwa pembunuh bila die cari balik semua org2 yg aniaya bpk dia. semua watak ni kita dpt tahu ada dlm satu jasad kat penghujung cerita nii. i was like.."oohhh patutt laaaaa.." haha.. cerita ni mmg buat kita asyik memikir je. the best part is, bila dia jd Carlos, macho gila okayy! sebelum dia membunuh, dia akan cakap "aku adalah tunggak keadilan dan setiap kesalahan hanya mempunyai satu hukuman saja iaitu hukuman mati mandatori". bila dah mati dia akan cakap "case closed!". hahahaha.. machoo gile kann! :) Carlos memburu org yg betol2 melakukan kejahatan yg tak dpt diadili mengikut undang2. jadi dia jatuhkan hukuman ikut undang2 die sndri.

panjang pulak aku bercerita. hahaha. tp seriously cite ni interesting. no regret if you read em'. sekarang ni aku nk carik balik novel Adam tu. ntah mana tah hilang. hopefully jumpa lah nanti. rindu Haikal sharp shooter yg hensem. hihihihihi.. okay melerett! dah kbai.

Monday, June 27, 2011

hidden truth

okay I copy this from LC. just for fun. :)
NAME: NOR HAYATI BT HASHIM
AGE: 21
BIRTHDATE: 2ND JUNE 1990
PRESENT ADDRESS: TAMAN  PUTRA JAYA. SHAH ALAM.

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with Truths about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. last beverage = teh o suam
2. last phone call = ApizGambala just called me 2minutes ago. :)
3. last text message = it was my couzie, Wanie.
4. last song you listened to = Ana Raffali- dan ku biarkan kau terlepas
5. last time you cried = on my birthday 3weeks ago.

HAVE YOU EVER:
6. dated someone twice = no
7. been cheated on = yes
8. kissed someone & regretted = yes!! stupidest mistake in life!!! ┌П┐(◣_◢)┌П┐
9. lost someone special = yeah 7month ago
10. been depressed = this should not be a question. haha. ofcourse! 

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
11. white
12. pink
13. black

LAST YEAR (2010), HAVE YOU:
14. Made a new friend = I'm not sure
15. Fallen in love = Yes with the same person since 2009
16. Laughed until you cried = yes
17. Met someone who changed you = no i changed by myself
18. Found out who your true friends were = surprisingly yes
19. Found out someone was talking about you = yes, mental sorang2
20. Kissed anyone on your FB friend's list = yes

GENERAL:
21. How many people on your FB friends list do you know in real life = 60%
22. Do you have any pets = yahh! can't live without Sid, orange cat. 
23. Do you want to change your name = no but my nickname yes! 
24. What did you do for your last birthday = attending surprise bbq for me. :)
25. What time did you wake up today = 1.25pm
26. What were you doing at midnight last night = watching movie stored in my lappy
27. Name something you CANNOT wait for = another 4years from now. I'll keep it secret. hihi
28. Last time you saw your Mother= 30minutes ago. we eat manggis together. yeah alot!
29. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life = emotional management! i failed. 
30. What are you listening to right now = Big Time Rush ft Snoop Dog- Boyfriend
31. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom? = no
32. What's getting on your nerves right now = not gonna miss watch Transformers
33. Most visited webpage = Facebook, Twitter,Tumblr and Blogspot.
34. Nickname =  Atie (family), Yayangg (Uniselianss), Nyot (some people who closed to me)
35. Relationship Status = single and not searching
36. Zodiac sign = Gemini
37. Male or Female = Female
38. Elementary = SK Bandar Baru Seri Petaling
39. High School = SMK Bukit Jalil
40. College = Universiti Selangor
41. Hair color = coffee brown
42. Long or short = medium
43. Height = 165cm
44. Do you have a crush on someone? = u mean now? NO
45. What do you like about yourself? = Chinese look. lol 
46. Tattoos = NO, sakit.
47. Righty or lefty = Righty

FIRSTS:
48. First surgery = eye
49. First piercing = 12yo
50. First best friend = if TRUE best friend, it was Jia Shamsuri.
51. First sport you joined = long jump
52. First vacation = somewhere but only in Malaysia
53. First pair of trainers = can't remember

RIGHT NOW:
54. Eating = no
55. Drinking = no
56. I'm about to = drive thru Mcd
57. Listening to = Enya- Only Time
58. Waiting for = Transformers on 29june

YOUR FUTURE:
59. Want kids? = twins!
60. Get Married? = 26
61. Career? = I'm trying hard for it.

WHICH IS BETTER:
62. Lips or eyes = my sepet eyes ofcourse. soalan ape nii? haha
63. Hugs or kisses = both
64. Shorter or taller = Taller
65. Older or Younger = Older
66. Romantic or spontaneous = romantic
67. Nice stomach or nice arms = stomach
68. Sensitive or loud = both depends on situation
69. Hook-up or relationship = relationship 
70. Trouble maker or hesitant = trouble maker

HAVE YOU EVER:
71. Kissed a stranger = no
72. Lost glasses/contacts = not yet
73. Sex on first date = I'm still virgin
74. Broke someone's heart = yeah and regretted whole life.
75. Had your own heart broken = happy 7month moving on anniversary 
76. Been arrested = once. haha.. shaiittt!
77. Turned someone down = yes but i don't meant it
78. Cried when someone died = imma human, so yes
79. Fallen for a friend = best friend actually. 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
80. Yourself = the most
81. Miracles = yes
82. Love at first sight = only if i met Chad face to face
83. Heaven = Yes
84. Santa Claus = hotak hang! 
85. Kiss on the first date = not really. 
86. Angels = yes
87. Karmas = i always believe in karma. 

btw, i added question number 87. okay, i won't tagg any of you guys. siapa yang nak buat, you know what to do then. have fun! thanks to LC for sharing. 

Saturday, June 25, 2011

tidak semua peluang bertemu manisnya

kita selalu aja dengar apa orang kata "everyone deserve a second chance". bagi aku, penerimaan sesuatu benda, baik kebaikan ataupun keburukan adalah berbeza. and we can't expect people. sometimes expectation is good, but the high one could kill us. kehendak dan kemahuan manusia kita tak boleh nak jangka. ada yg berubah mengikut akal yg logik, ade jugak yg lebih selesa melayan karenah2 emosi. bezanya melampau ataupun tidak, kita sendiri yang kawal. bukan orang lain. bukan sesiapa. kadang kala kita boleh mengelak, tapi saja hendak merasa. merasa apa, kita sendiri pon tak faham. siapa yang boleh baca? siapa yg tahu apa kita rasa bila hati sendiri tak tahu apa yg kita hendak. memang takde sesiapa yg dpt baca. aku rasa inilah kegagalan yg paling memalukan bila kita tak boleh nak mengawal diri sendiri apatah lagi sang hati yg paling mengenali diri kita sendiri. jadi, belajar belajar dan belajar utk mengawal sesuatu emosi dan situasi. pengalaman adalah guru tercinta yg tak pernah jemu utk mengajar kita.

back to the topic, siapa yang layak dapat peluang kedua? bagi aku semua org layak dapat peluang ni. tapi malangnya, bukan semua org sanggup utk memberi. dan paling kasihan kepada org2 yang menungu utk diberi peluang kedua yg juga tak dpt merasa satu perasaan utk menghargai peluang itu. bagi aku, peluang kedua adalah satu penghargaan yg tak ternilai dan tidak mungkin kita akan sia siakan. mungkin disiakan bagi org yg buta erti betapa besarnya makna peluang itu. yang boleh mengubah hidup seseorang, yang boleh mengejar kebahagiaan, yang boleh menyatukan hati dan paling penting, yang boleh mengubah diri sendiri. itulah PELUANG yang paling bermakna. apa2pun, itu semua terserah kepada hak masing2. sama ada memberi itu akan menuju kebaikan ataupun keburukan. manusia semakin bijak berfikir, cuma kelihatan bodoh bila manusia tidak reti membuat keputusan. orang yg memberi dan diberi adalah dua insan yg bertuah kerana tidak lalai dan masih mengambil berat utk menyelesaikan sesuatu perkara. mereka ada rasa itu. tapi ingat, peluang itu tidak semestinya berjaya.

aku sendiri pernah merasa peluang itu. peluang kedua yg aku gunakan sebaik mungkin utk menebus kesilapan lalu walaupun pada mulanya dia pernah ckp dkt aku dulu, bagi dia, peluang kedua itu tak pernah ada dlm hidup and dia tak pernah bagi peluang kedua dkt sapa2. lama lama, dia bagi juga peluang itu. sbb apa? dia aja yang tahu. aku cuba utk pulihkan kembali segalanya. dia pon mencuba utk kembalikan apa yang kami ada dulu. mungkin tidak mahu kemanisan hubungan yg bermula dr seorang sahabat hilang begitu sahaja. tapi rasa dulu tak mungkin sama lagi. jadi aku lepaskan. sperti yg aku cakap td, tidak semua peluang bertemu manisnya. sekurang2 kita cuba dan diberi peluang utk diperbaiki. jika tidak menjadi, itu adalah kerja yang Maha Esa. aku bertuah sbb pernah merasai perasaan itu dan aku rasa aku adalah perempuan pertama yang dia beri peluang kedua. terima kasih :)

jangan terlalu menghukum seseorang. semua org pernah buat silap. tidak susah utk memberi peluang kepada yang layak. matangkan fikiran, lapangkan dada, fikirkan....... layak ke seseorang itu diberi peluang kedua.. hanya diri sndri yg lebih mengenali betol tak? jadi...berilah peluang kedua dan gunakan sebaiknya. penyesalan kesalahan lalu pastinya ckup memberi pengajaran. (tertakluk kpd sifat seseorang) hahahaahahaha.. kbai

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

thank you for the precious present


hari ni bangun pukul 11.00... entah kenapa aku rasa mlm semalam malam yg aku paling buas tido. aku bangun2 je td semua bantal jatuh dr katil. semua okay? 1st time mcm nii. aduuhh tak sleeping beauty lah semalam. hehehe.nasib hp tak jatuh sekali. aku pon tak tahu lah semalam aku ngigau ape dol. bertukar transformer agaknya. 

otey hari ni aku nk update pasal present2 yang aku dpt tahun nii. ade yg dpt advance, ade yg dpt lambat. tapi aku bkn kesah pon lambat ke cepat ke. even tak bangi pon takpe sbb aku dh besar kan. :p okay the 1st present yg aku dpt is from Mak, mak bagi awal, sgt advance uoollllss.tp apa dia biarlah menjadi rahsia hati beta but it cost about 2thousand. heeee..thank you mak. then, the 1st present on my birthday is from jia, thank you i like it so muchh! teringat pulak masa aku pakai baju yg kau bg tu pastu dlm kete tu aku tersengih2 sambil pandang kau, kau tak perasan langsung! pastu boleh ckp lagi "kau kenapa gileee sengih2 mcm nii.." :(( sedih kene sound. padahal nk tunjuk iteww ukeww baju tuu.. :p haha. then, Apiz bought me something from Paris, thank you braahhh! tahu tahu je taste aku. :) then present Kak Lieza is from Bandung. not forget to Khairul Nizam, thanks for the purse! damn i like it so much, also for the cake. To Ayu and Nadu, thank you for the dress and handbeg. woooaahhhh! nnt aku pakai bila kita keluar otey. :) and the rest of my family, Pidos, Aju, my beloved sistah Nina, Ayah for the mooneeyyhhhh! THANK YOU ALL, MUCH APPRECIATED! with love, Atie Tunin, Yayangg, anak ayah dgn mak, adik abg2 dan kakak. :p




ini dari 3 hero aku, 3H stands for Haziq, Hazim, Harizs
oh terlupa pulak to those who make a call to wish, its Muhammad Iqbal which is the 1st person. tepat pukul 12.00. dia abang angkat aku dah 12tahun. :) 2nd was Fendy Julien, aduuhhh ade mende yg buat aku maluu time nii! ssshhhh keep it low okey. haha :p 3rd is Kamil Haziq yg janji nak belanja chillis :) okay semua lelaki kann! haha. okay thanks semua! yg wish sms and bbm pon! thanksss!

p/s : you gave me your "silenceness" on my birthday. if you really appreciate me as your friend (as you said to me before), and you remember how hard i tried to make things special on your birthday before,  you'll at least leave me some word on my happiest day. true color have shown, i was wrong about you. :)

thank you for the precious present..

Suprise BBQ on 2nd June 2011

oh hello tawan tawan. seperti yang aku janjikan, banyaknya cerita yg nk dikongsi dgn korg semua. again, sorry for the "silenceness" as i've been sooooo busy lately. especially struggle for finals. so dewm lepu! duhhh.. :p okay rasanya mcm klaka bila baru nk update pasal my sweet 21st birthday, but then its okay. gelak gelak dulu, kang kena kang. haha.. lets begin.....................................
alalalaala tgk muka birthday girl menanesss..hiks!
actually aku ada tweet yg this year is the worse birthday that i had. but its only at the beginning when i cried that morning. duhh..pagi pagi birthday girl dah menaness daahhh..haha. SEBAB, bila family abang aku tak dapat join family bbq as he needs to balik Kedah on that day. benda ni aku dah tahu lama btw. then pagi tu pulak, sayang aku Jia tersalah faham dgn ape yg aku ckp. dia ingat bbq tu cancel sbb family abg aku tade and she decided to go back to hometown Jerantut with her sister. haa yg ni la yg aku menangis pagi2 tu. huhuhu.. aku tak marah pon Jia, sikit pon tak marah, tapi hati ni tak boleh nk sorok rasa sedih yg teramatttt sgt. BUT,  my impression on that morning was totally wrong yah! i guess i forgot the other ohsem friend of mine out there. taaaaraaaaa!! they make a surprise bbq for me!! hihihihi.. 


sumpah aku tak jangka. about at 9 fara tetiba ajak lepak, tapi aku dah rasa pelik sikit dh sebab dia call aku, die ckp die dh ade kt bwh umah aku. ehh selalu aku yg tggu bwh umah die. yang lagi pelikkknye, bila aku turun dia tak bg aku bwk kete. Cinta Sayang tu mmglah dekat je tp aku mmg tak jalan kaki la sbb nnt aku nk balik sorg, aku boring. haha. okay tgh jln tu tetiba ada tangan yg menutup mata aku dr blkng. haha.. its wan nash my lovely buddy! so then kitorg lepak dekat 'smart kitchen' so called Dapur Pintar. haha.. tak jadi lpk cinta sayang, tak sukaa! :p borak punye borak, bdk dua ekor si fara dgn wan ajak gi jln2 naik kereta pulak dh. aku layankan aje. dh mcm bapak bwk anak2 tgk kawasan dh. haha. then kitorg benti dkt mcd section2 sbb aku nk terkencieenn jap. haa kat sini lah dorg tetiba tutup mata aku dgn kain hitam. pening aku dlm kete tu.fara duk asik marah aku sbb mulut aku asik bising je. mauuu tak memekak aku dlm kete tuu.. haha.. bila dh sampai destinasi, dorg pgg aku and bwk aku sampai satu tempat, pastu dorg lepas kan aku. ni kongg ajaa ni sape punye idea. pastu ade lak yg cuit2..haha.. then aku bkk kain hitam, surpriseeeeee! diorang nanyi ramai2 lagu birthday. demmitt! aku menangis lagi. mmg tahun ni tahun hari lahir menangis aku rasa. lol.








okay to all my beloved buddies, Jia, Faa, Farris, Arep, Wan Nash, Fara, Marry, Tuyai.. you guys are ohsem. thank you for make this happened. i love you guys. and i would say that this year is the best and greatest birthday ever!! 


HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME AND MY SISTER NINASABRINA HASHIM. 
THANK YOU ALL. 

p/s: sorry quality gamba tak memuaskan dan malas nak edit. hihihihi..