my way

i wish i can fix back everything to normal.
as i suppose to be. why is everything looks messy to me.
its hard to keep everything smooth and calm. as before.
from now on i will let everything flows by itself.
and surprisingly, i need to stop being damn emotional about everything.

why does the whole world remind me of you?
i cant go anywhere. i could only stay in my dark room.
sitting at the back door. holding my memories
and breath some smell. put it back in the box then.
i've accepted the fact that things changed
how difficult it is for me to admit it. damn.

now im finding my way back.
forgive myself for being awfully stupid.
i wont blame myself anymore.
yes i lose but my heart still win.
at least i was using the precious time to express and show.
rather than saying nothing when you supposed to.
well i guess my heart is brave enuff then.

redha and pray.

hari ini SAHAJA

• bangun pagi. mandi. pakai baju grey, legging grey cair dgn cardigan hitam. tiba tiba selipar pink. ok naaaaiiissss..
• kelas En Dat = PENDING
• naik kereta baru Famee pergi makan. sizzling chicken mushroom rice tak habes.
• kelas Nego = loading............. ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
• malam ni aku makan pizza. sorang sorang. thanks Aju sbb bagi kupon hot ticket, so aku tambah rm1 je utk dptkan satu pizza kecik. okay ah tu, muat muat tank aku je.
• assignment media persuasion and crisis management banyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaak gilooooooooooooooooo..! cano nak buek ni..
• petang tadi terserempak, terkeras skejap
• esok pas kelas terus balik serdang gomol gomol Bola dgn Sid. 
• sedang minum susu kambing.
• selamat malam

Jiapang!

perrgghh..punye la lame baru ade kesempatan nak update! bussynyee dah mengalahkan lawyer! okay, 1^st of all I would like to wish a Happy 21^st Birthday to my syg, Jia Shamsuri. May God bless you. I wish and always pray that your dream will come true as you always wish bebeh. next year dah boleh kahwin ni.hihihi. Well, I don’t have any unique or fucking sweeeeeettt ideas to make such big surprise because i really don’t know how to plan, in other words, I’m not into surprising! Haha but, I’ve tried something different to celebrate her birthday. at least it will be remembered. maklumlah, surprise drpd org yang dok reti buat surprise! lol. I ask my friends and few classmates to join the drama together. All of sudden, I’ve got an idea! Well, because of we madly being obsessed with karaoke and apparently getting chronic, so i've decided to celebrate there. almost every week kitorg memekik kat Redbox Sunway. Oh what an extreme addicted! haha! Okay back to the plan, the plan looks messy at the first place. As I said before, I’m not a good bombshell planer!  But thank God and thanks to Faa, Fara, Apek, Arep, Tuyai, Mira and others who make this plan goin easy and smooth.  Everything went perfect as well as we planned. It’s not really a big surprise but I bet Jia got enough shock when suddenly a group of our friends bring a Chocolate Cheese cake and sing a happy birthday song when she was singing. The best part is, she didn’t aspect they would come. confirm tak sangka. Oh another best and pity part, im sorry darling, I bluffed you! There’s no such Redbox promotion on that day! ape ko ingat promotion Thaipusam ke! haha.. and say sorry to your friend as you being so excited to text her about the promotion. Haha. Whatever it is, I hope you had so much fun and Happy Birthday to my dear Jiapang who celebrated her birthday last Friday. thanks again to em' especially the dalang dalangsss.. haha. 

adoo banyak lagi gamba tapi maleh nak hapload..

rather than

choose to love rather than hate
choose to laugh rather than cry
choose to create rather than destroy
choose to preserver rather than quit
choose to heal rather than wound
choose to give rather than steal
choose to act rather than procrastinate
choose to grow rather than rot
choose to pray rather than curse
choose to live rather than die

well, i've learned something and motivated myself today. do you?

jar of heart

have u guys watch this video clip Jar of Heart by Christina Peri? oh emm jaayy! i am soo soo soo falling in love with the scene and the 'story'. it's ohsemmm! i bet you guys will fall in love too.. serious! tiba tiba rasa nak bercita cita jd seorang penari..haha.. well, suara minah ni kasar gila but sangat sesuai dgn lagu ni. tapi tapi tapi, bila dia nyanyi lagu Speechless by Lady Gagal tak sodap langsung okeh..! itu betol Gagal..! lol. the lyric was sooooo deeeeeeep... i like it so much. the lyrics keep popping in my head even when im driving. 

"who do you think you are?" and yesss! who do you think you aree??? hihihi. okay guys, shut up, silence, listen, feel, think!

25

"once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random, things, facts or goal about you. at the end, chose 25 people to be tagged. you have to tagged the person who tagged you. if i tag you, its because i want to know more about you. "

okay hari ni barulah aku perasan yang aku ditag oleh jia shamsuri.. haha. 

okay guys..let me tell yah..!

1. name penoh shaye Norhayati Bt Hashim. awalnya mase aku lahir, abg aku suggest nama Jasmine and tiba2 ayah letak nama norhayati dlm surat beranak. hehehehe.. norhayati bermaksud " the light of the soul ".

2. aku ade 5 adik beradik. 3 abg dan satu kakak tersyg dan aku yang paling last , daddy's little girl yaww! haha. oh lupe, aku ade sorg kakak ipar dan sorg abg ipar. tak ketinggalan, 3 org anak buah, hero hero belaka.. :) 3H

3. aku mula tadika dekat tadika apee tah tak ingat, lepas tu mula skola rendah dekat sk bandar baru seri petaling, then continue dekat sekolah menengah bukit jalil.

4. rumah ku syurga ku kini berada di taman putra jaya, seri kembangan tapi sekarang menetap kat rumah bujang shah alam seksyen 7.

5. previously im taking Diploma Communication and Media and currently taking Bachelor (Hons) Corporate Communication at University Industry Selangor.

6. aku berkongsi tarikh lahir yang same dgn kakak aku, 2nd june walaupun jarak umur kitorg jauh sgt sgt.. perfect timing isn't it? haha

7. since sekolah rendah lg aku aktif sukan tp org tak pggil name aku, org pggil "adik firdaus" hahaha.. teringat pulak.. 4tahun berturut2 jd olahragawati. sampai dh takde muke org lain. mesti aku dgn abg aku je. haha.

8. sampailah sekolah menengah aku still aktif main dekat MSSKL dlm sprinter, lompat jauh dan lompat kijang. sampai berbekas jugaklah kenangan bila tulang blkng aku senget dan tersasar dr tempat asal. haha.

9. so sampai hari ni aku still sakit blkng even dh pernah masukkan balik tulang ke posisi yg betol ikut cara tradisional but then tak lame, tulang tu teruk balik. 

10. aku mempunyai sijil tamat sekolah dengan tertera 76 hari ponteng. hahahaha.

11. aku seorang yang periang tp ikut mood, aku susah nk mulakan perbualan dgn org yg aku baru kenal. 

12. aku tak ramai kwn perempuan dan tak berape suke kwn dgn perempuan (maaf agak bias statement ini) , aku mmg byk kwn lelaki drpd perempuan.

13. biarlah org nak kate aku gatal ke ape, aku lebih suke bergaul dan kwn dgn laki. org yg betol2 kenal aku je tahu aku mcmane. dorg2 ni lah yg buat aku berfikir lg luas and of course cara pemikiran lelaki sgt berbeza. i learned a lot..! dan mungkin sbb ni jugak kot aku jd kebal. haha. klu setakat nk buli2 tu tak pyh la wey..

14. but still, aku ade kwn2 perempuan yg sgt ohsemmm! ayu, nanad and ain yg dah cecah 9tahun usia friendship kitorg. ofcourse, Jia sayang, Fara, Mira, Faa yg aku syg sgt sgt. haa dorg2 ni jelah yg boleh masuk dgn aku. yg lain tu, classmate sume bese2 je. 

15. dan abg abg sayeeee di rumah agam.. mereka2 inilah yg byk membantu aku, byk bg keceriaan dlm hidup aku, yg byk mengajar aku. paling penting, yg byk bg aku kenangan manis.  takde org lain boleh ganti. i miss you guys. i meant it..! 

16. okay tutup hal kwn, masuk bab makan pulak. aku tak makan chocolate, limau, daging lembu, kambingg... yekkk! haha. daging lembu tu jia sorg je yg tahu nape aku tak mkn. lol

17. aku suke mkn tom yam mak, dried chilli chicken sidewalk. chicken cordon bleu secret recipe, and aku suke gila mkn dkt Fullhouse. terasa environment korea! haha.. eh lupeee! Night Circle ofcouurrseeee! apa2 pun makanan mestilah pedas..!

18. setiap tahun aku ade diary sendiri, aku syg Pexie aku, aku benci teddy bear, aku HANYE suke patung lembu sahaja. 

19. aku tak hot sgt. tak terlalu bergaya, memang tak kaya. tapi manisnye adeee..haha

20. hmmmm berat badan adelah dlm 46kg skrg ni. berat bdn pernah turun mendadak dr 56kg sampai 43 kg sebab................... sebab bersebab laa..

21. in relationship with my self and family. currently not falling in love with anybody else.

22. aku obses gila dgn kucing. automatik jadi gedik bila nmpk kucing.

23. currently listening to Christina Peri, jar of heart and keep repeat this song 17ratus kali dh.

24. i want to buy new phone as my pink phone already berkecai. 

25. i want to finish my study, get a great job, balas jasa mak dan ayah, to be somebody, to be proud, and get the plan b.. :)

kite tengok sapeeee yang kenaaaaa.. : jia shamsuri balik, hyzry fahmey, diyana azlan, lyanna conrad, nisa kay, annie natasha, lana suhaime, lulubesh, apizgagahperkasa, bebe, fareha, supiha, waffey, aziera,  dan sape2 yg nak buat tu, suke hati korg laaaahh..

kadangkala

sometimes im in.sometimes im out.

 sometimes i rise.sometimes i fall.

sometimes im up.sometimes im down.

 sometimes im on.sometimes im off.

sometimes i get.sometimes i dont.

sometimes i laugh.sometimes i fake.

sometimes i see.sometimes im blind.

sometimes im happy.sometimes im sad.

sometimes i miss.sometimes i hurt.

sometimes i hurt .sometimes i hate.

sometimes i hate.sometimes i love.

sometimes i love.sometimes i NEED. 

always and everyday..

and sometimes im gay. bye